Breathe Wonder

Jordyn. 21. Student.

desirethepositive:

I want to open a really angry coffee shop called “I’m Not a Morning Person” and name all the drinks really angrily

like “can I get a Fuck You” or a “I’m Studying for Finals” or “My In-Laws are in Town”

and they all have shots of tequila in them

who wants to be my business partner

(via shady-spits-his-flow)

shslgoomy:

wannagetlost:

tenley-pie:

elihzbah:

putmedownpunk:

#kermit you uplifting motherfucker

that tag.

This movie just makes me so happy.

100% accurate tagging

Hajime Hinata needs to see this

shslgoomy:

wannagetlost:

tenley-pie:

elihzbah:

putmedownpunk:

#kermit you uplifting motherfucker

that tag.

This movie just makes me so happy.

100% accurate tagging

Hajime Hinata needs to see this

(via amiunlikeableyet)

thetardis-in-221b:

This scene just gets sadder and sadder the older I get.

(via thesearemysecretsnotyours)

jordosross:

nickandjades-infinitelaughter:

Me as a parent

"This is why dad left"

(via vulnerable-so-vulnerable)

I wanna be your “1am I can’t sleep” text

times-like-these7:

sorelatable:

If your name is on one of these I just wanna let you know your parents are basic bitches with no creativity

image

Sounds like someone’s sad they couldn’t find their name on a coke bottle

(via yourheartliveson)

reginamas:

i just told my mom i died at birth and i’ve been a ghost this entire time just growing and manifesting into the daughter she’d lost

and she’s just like

well please go to the light because i am tired of your shit

(via yourheartliveson)

weirdos-at-our-finest:

harryis-acupcake:

niick4:

danger-mouz:

calirosegold:

patronustrip:

tootsienoodles:

freackthehopeful:

skylarghost:

weasleyrocksyoursocks:

seong:

I AM FUCKING SCREAMING BECAUSE THIS IS SERIOUSLY THE BEST THING EVER
SWEET JESUS

You have your mother’s cheek bones

godDAMMIT NOW WE’RE SHIPPING CUTLERY
TUMBLR YOU NEED TO S T O P

I hope this post comes back to me when it has a short story attached. 

The Utensils were a happy family, just like any other. Fork was a loving, caring father, who worked at a bank, and Spoon was his beautiful wife, who owned a small business that allowed her to spend a lot of time with their son, Spork. Every day, when Fork came home from work, he gently clinked against the rim of Spoon’s face and asked how her day had been. She would go on and on about how her Aunt Bowl was letting anyone fill her up these days, and telling him he would never guess who they got a phone call from today (it was his brother, Knife), and he would just lean back against the china cabinet, staring at his wife’s beautiful reflective surface, and know everything was right in the world. 
One day, however, everything was suddenly not right in the world at all.
Fork woke up in the silverware drawer and instantly knew something was wrong. He looked over to where Spoon normally slept, confused when he saw nothing but empty space. Or, at least, he thought it was empty. It took him a minute to see the small note left there. Oh no. God, no, he thought.
He picked up the note with shaking prongs, and read amid tears:
“Fork,
     I’m sorry to leave you like this, but I just couldn’t face seeing you. It’s too painful. I’m not strong enough to tell you this to your face, and I know that makes me a coward. I know that makes me a horrible utensil. But I can’t do this anymore.
     Do you remember Cow’s party the other night? The night she was so drunk she swore she jumped over the moon? Well, I met someone that night. His name is Dish. And we’re running away together.
     Please, don’t try and find us. Dish makes me happy. He doesn’t spend all day staring at me, looking at himself in my reflection. 
Goodbye, Fork.
-Spoon”
Fork collapsed to the ground, wishing he could tell Spoon that the reason he loved staring at her reflective surface so much, was because of the way her surface magnified everything around her, making it seem so much greater and more beautiful than people could see themselves as normally. Her personality did the same thing. It’s what he loved most about her. And what he would miss most of all.

I CAN’T EVEN WITH THIS FUCKING SITE.


bra..fucking..vo

sweet jesus i’m crying over cutlery

things like this make me happy i have a tumblr

i’M CRYING… BECAUSE CUTLERY. 
This website is going to be the death of me.

Ive never been so said about cutlery…

weirdos-at-our-finest:

harryis-acupcake:

niick4:

danger-mouz:

calirosegold:

patronustrip:

tootsienoodles:

freackthehopeful:

skylarghost:

weasleyrocksyoursocks:

seong:

I AM FUCKING SCREAMING BECAUSE THIS IS SERIOUSLY THE BEST THING EVER

SWEET JESUS

You have your mother’s cheek bones

godDAMMIT NOW WE’RE SHIPPING CUTLERY

TUMBLR YOU NEED TO S T O P

I hope this post comes back to me when it has a short story attached. 

The Utensils were a happy family, just like any other. Fork was a loving, caring father, who worked at a bank, and Spoon was his beautiful wife, who owned a small business that allowed her to spend a lot of time with their son, Spork. Every day, when Fork came home from work, he gently clinked against the rim of Spoon’s face and asked how her day had been. She would go on and on about how her Aunt Bowl was letting anyone fill her up these days, and telling him he would never guess who they got a phone call from today (it was his brother, Knife), and he would just lean back against the china cabinet, staring at his wife’s beautiful reflective surface, and know everything was right in the world. 

One day, however, everything was suddenly not right in the world at all.

Fork woke up in the silverware drawer and instantly knew something was wrong. He looked over to where Spoon normally slept, confused when he saw nothing but empty space. Or, at least, he thought it was empty. It took him a minute to see the small note left there. Oh no. God, no, he thought.

He picked up the note with shaking prongs, and read amid tears:

“Fork,

     I’m sorry to leave you like this, but I just couldn’t face seeing you. It’s too painful. I’m not strong enough to tell you this to your face, and I know that makes me a coward. I know that makes me a horrible utensil. But I can’t do this anymore.

     Do you remember Cow’s party the other night? The night she was so drunk she swore she jumped over the moon? Well, I met someone that night. His name is Dish. And we’re running away together.

     Please, don’t try and find us. Dish makes me happy. He doesn’t spend all day staring at me, looking at himself in my reflection. 

Goodbye, Fork.

-Spoon”


Fork collapsed to the ground, wishing he could tell Spoon that the reason he loved staring at her reflective surface so much, was because of the way her surface magnified everything around her, making it seem so much greater and more beautiful than people could see themselves as normally. Her personality did the same thing. It’s what he loved most about her. And what he would miss most of all.

I CAN’T EVEN WITH THIS FUCKING SITE.

image

bra..fucking..vo

sweet jesus i’m crying over cutlery

things like this make me happy i have a tumblr

i’M CRYING… BECAUSE CUTLERY. 

This website is going to be the death of me.

Ive never been so said about cutlery…

(via amiunlikeableyet)

taylorwifts:

IF YOU ARE A FRESHMAN IN HIGH SCHOOL RIGHT NOW I ADVISE YOU TO DO YOUR BEST SERIOUSLY I THOUGHT HIGH SCHOOL WAS SUPPOSED TO BE FUN AND I DIDN’T DO SHIT AND NOW MY C’S ON MY FRESHMAN REPORT CARDS ARE KILLING ME IN MY COLLEGE APPS AND I WISH SOMEONE HAD TOLD ME TO DO BETTER SO PLEASE LISTEN TO ME IF YOU ARE A FRESHMAN GOOD GRADES ARE COOL

(via amiunlikeableyet)

sovietunions:

one thing i never do is write a rough draft it’s all or nothing go big or go home

(via yourheartliveson)

bunny-too-morrow:

lesbeeanmovie:

greencarnations:

cinematicsymphony:

This is so accurate. At school, we literally have children who will watch our facial expressions to see if them falling is as bad as they think it might be.

CORRECT CHILD INJURY PROCEDURE:

  • do not react. at the most, maybe wince and go “ooooh”
  • go over to the child to assess panic level and severity of injury
  • if they’re like, dying, remain calm, but they’re probably not.
  • look them in the eye and ask, “you okay?” they will nod. possibly all teary-eyed. then ask, “are we gonna need to cut it off?”
  • the child is thrown off. if they giggle, you’re in the money. if they do not, put a bandaid on and do some sympathetic patting. they are probably a little teary. let the sad little bug sit out for a minute. they will quickly get bored.
  • works every time

"sad little bug" is the cutest and most accurate term ive heard used to describe a child because sometimes bugs are kinda super cute sometimes bugs are really fucking annoying and sometimes bugs are downright TERRIFYING

My dad be used the ‘do we need to cut it off’ line on me

(via breezybg34)

virginsacrificer:

i thought i was the only horny sarcastic introverted genius third wheel stuck up asshole until i discovered this blue internet support group and i’ve been an active member of it since then

(via ruinedchildhood)

officialnorthamerica:

I hate when my phone dies and I can’t get to a charger for like an hour. What happened while I was gone? Is Kate still married to William? How old is Blue Ivy? Who is the president Idk man my phone died

(via wholetjackdrive)

I love the rain. I love how it softens the outlines of things. The world becomes softly blurred, and I feel like I melt right into it.
Hanamoto Hagumi, Honey and Clover (via clumsiest)

(via dirtroaddaydream)

Honestly, at the end of the day if you can’t go to bed content with the way things are then you need to get up and fix it before you sleep. Period.
My parents every time I try to cry myself to sleep. (via psych-facts)